Author: Nancy the Writer

EFFECTIVE-LY

Posted on by Nancy the Writer

“You’re a horrible student.”  I will never forget Ms. Brenda Buce.  “Now, you’re a great stylist, and I’m sure that you’re a great mother,” said the brilliant cosmetology instructor almost ten years ago, “but you have only 100 percent, and if you’re doing ten things, then you’re only able to give ten percent of you to each thing.”

That put things into perspective for me, and it still does.  I only wish that I had abided by those words years ago.  I have always done too many things at once…me and my self-imposed deadlines.  Sigh.  I believe (I know) that this has been my own undoing.  No, it’s not so much that I’m a bad time manager or an ineffective multitasker—in many instances, quite the contrary.

Because I tend to multitask pretty well, I often find myself taking on far too much, while shouting the mantra “We got this!”  Me and Jesus, that is.  Later, exhausted, as I whisper the same with an added inflection of question, I can see the Savior’s smiling side-eye as He peels my fatigued fingers from the wheel, one by one.

JesusWatching

Thank You, Lord.

Independent of a certain wisdom, gorging on every ‘necessary’ option, I’ve consistently continued to load my plate with what I’ve ‘needed’ to accomplish within the next two years…six months…three weeks…ten days…eight hours…30 minutes…etc…whatever.

Overly ambitious.

I haven’t done much else (lately) that has caused my mother grief except managing life at levels that cause her to fear that I will overload, stroke out and bust a vein causing much needed blood cells and necessary bits of organ to ooze from my ears as I try to fit just one more thing onto my tightly packed calendar, squeezing snatches of sleep between emails and errands.

O, I gets ‘er done, but at what cost?

I’m getting older, heavier, time is passing, my child is graduating, and the matters of my life have managed to whisk me away from what matters most to me.  In an attempt to improve my life, I am missing out on it.

My business is my life’s work, and I absolutely love it.  Writing is like breathing for me—natural and necessary.  Getting paid to do it is the sweet cream cheese icing on my cake.  I only wish that I could savor it instead of winded-ly rushing from deadline to deadline.

I love to read, and I have so much of it to do for work, but I wish that I could just kick back and read a good book for pure personal enjoyment more often than I find myself currently able.

My children are my strength, my weakness, my inspiration, true sources of joy and aggravation, and they are growing up before my eyes just out of sight…growing over (what sometimes seems like) a whole foot overnight.  I wish that I were more involved in their activities…in their everyday…in their lives.  I’ve raised them to be independent (I’m divorced…we’ve had to be), but they need me, and the truth is that when they’ve grown and gone off to live their lives (which will be much sooner than later), I will need to have been there…I already happen to know this.  Selah

Well, no more wishing.  Especially since the only person in the way of what I’m wishing for is me.  I own this moment, and in it I decide to be more intentional as I commit to a simpler, yet thriving existence.

I’d like to quote Valerie Burton’s book, Successful Women Think Differently.  But I won’t.  (Mostly because I didn’t mark the quote in the book and now I’ve lost it and instead of pausing to spend valuable time to find it because I’d like to finish this post instead of adding it to my list of to-do,) I can make reference to it in a paraphrase, and you can go get the book yourself.  You should anyway.  It’s a pretty good book.

In it, she talks about a successful singer who used to be a secretary.  She asked this lady how she came about her success as a singer.  The lady replied that she had no degree, minimal skills, and not many other options.  Singing was all she had, “so it had to work.”  #lightbulb

I will no longer gorge on options.  They are great to have, and it’s great to know that I have them, but I have assessed them and chosen the best of where to invest the best of me.  All other options are options still, but are to remain in the pot…simmering and ready, but currently my plate is full.  Balanced and full.

#RantingsInWriting

#MeHereForMe

#ReadyToLIVE

#SavorLife

#Balanced

#Intentional

#Full

#AlphabetSoup

#ImWrite

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Let Go and Grab the Gift

Posted on by Nancy the Writer

“Rejection is God’s protection.”

I heard myself saying to the young woman the very same words that had been uttered to me, among other inspirational thoughts in an attempt to explain why people turn away.  My heart went out to her because she had obviously found herself in a place of awesome loneliness.

To be largely left alone is a gift unrealized by the masses and unappreciated by many because of the natural human need to feel accepted—a nagging byproduct of the human condition.  However, not one so strong it can’t be overcome.

Aloneness, a more accurate description of the condition, is a necessary ingredient in the recipe for greatness.  Greatness, often confused with popularity, requires insight into self.  Others play a very small role in this part of the process, if at all.

However, I digress.

The young woman’s account brought back memories of how the icy finger of rejection selectively touched a few of those I held closest.  It hurt at the time, but I later realized that when impending elevation looms, God begins to pull people away—those who distract and those who can’t go with.

Oftentimes and especially if we tend to be loyal and devoted by nature, He knows that we would not let go unless we are let go of.  So goes the rejection.  “It’s hard to understand,” I said.  “But use this time as God intends.  Study, work, fast, pray, develop discipline, and acquire knowledge; treat yourself well.  You will need this where you are going.  And close your mouth.  Keep your plans to yourself.  Sharing the great wonderful that God has revealed to you as your destiny only provokes envy in those who have yet to discover the route to their own great wonderful.  And when this season is over, past, and gone, God will place people around you who are of like mind and purpose.  In keeping it real, don’t hold yourself back!”

The look in her eyes let me know that she couldn’t hear me past her pain.  I told her that I would pray for her, and I meant it.  She would stay on my mind just because she is a reminder that no matter what we go or have gone through, that we are not the only ones experiencing the place that we are in or the places where we’ve been.  When you become attached to people and time has fastened the hold, it’s hard to let go.

But O, the glorious day when we let go, let God, and move on, we find that our steps lead us to promised land.  It is then that we realize how our journey played its part and the beautiful truth in the scripture, “All things work together for good to them who love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose.”

Amen.

 

#ImWrite

#RantingsinWriting

#MyAlphabetSoup

 

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Current MOOD:

Posted on by Nancy the Writer

Inspired

While everyone is not necessarily an artist–as the term denotes, I do believe that we all possess art of one form or another, and we are all impacted by art in one form or another.  The human soul–the seat of the mind, the will, and the emotions–by virtue of the complexity of its parts, is a work of art in itself, each individual in its intricacies.

In my profession, I use statistics and analysis for technical writing (e.g., proposal content, advertising content, policies, manuals, etc.).  But then I get to take that information and creatively fashion together letters, words, paragraphs, silent sounds and sentences to craft communication in its simplest yet most explicative form to relay idea and intent.

And THAT, dear reader, is my God-given art.  He has placed such a treasure in us all.

Evidence that we are of the Divine.

#MyAlphabetSoup

#ImWrite

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‘Look at the Flip of that Script’

Posted on by Nancy the Writer

Haters.  Sigh.

First off, I’m that person who you either really like or you really don’t.

I dare to be different.  But not just for the sake of difference, but because I am most at peace when I embrace my own convictions.  I march to the beat of my own drum.

I’ve attempted to exist otherwise, and I didn’t quite like it.  Nope.  Didn’t like it at all.

Let me just say that I am a card carrying member, advocate, and supporter of I LOVE MY HATERS, Inc.  The wicked displacement of comfort that haters experience when I sashay (I can’t help it, my thighs are big) into a room, across a room, or out of a room with a sweet air of I-don’t-care usually doesn’t affect me in any way other than to bring a knowing smile to my beautifully shaped, MAC painted lips.

But I think the true disappointment comes when a HATER masquerades behind the friend mask.

A good friend of mine once said that those who are your biggest supporters in the beginning often become your biggest haters in the end and vice versa.

This caused me think about the #TeamNancy members who have travelled through my circle, and I decided that her assessment held merit.

It is often remarked by those who’ve known me for years that I have not changed.  Grown, yes, but I am basically the same person.  So I conclude that either they never really liked me from the beginning and only hung around to take notes on how to be awesome, or they found themselves beginning to like me so much that they didn’t know what to do.  Either way, let’s call them fans 🙂

The reality is:  When my life started to suck less and less and look better and better, a few ‘friends’ fell away more and more.

I accept full responsibility for this.  I have not always carefully chosen my friends.  I pretty much chose those who chose me or those who I thought could use a good friend.  And if I’m honest, I saw the subtle and not-so-subtle changes in attitude–the red flags, but I ignored them, hoping for the best.  #Naivety  #Denial

Sigh.

It’s always sad when a person”flips the script” from being a ‘friend’ to a sour, passively aggressive, mealy-mouthed cud-chewer whose smile dims more and more as the smiles of others brighten.  Poor thing.

#PeopleAreNotPermanent

This has been a hard lesson for me to learn because once I take someone into my heart, they then possess the power to injure me.  And sadly some of my fans wouldn’t pass up the opportunity to do so if you gave them $200 and let them pass GO.  However, I’ve since learned that people come in and out of your life and very few stay for the long haul.

So, no Nancy, you can’t go around handing out space in your heart all willy nilly, Love..

#Boundaries

..Because not everyone deserves it.

The energetic, always-happy-for-you, shoulder-you-cried-on, fluffy-saddie-now-winning-and-wishing-you-the-best-just-not-the-best-of-me friend gets off here.  Prenez Soin.

#MyAlphabetSoup

#ImWrite

 

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Listen Linda..

Posted on by Nancy the Writer

If you dismiss all expectation, this will be painless.  I’ve existed for so long (as best I could) in form…not fakery, mind you, but appropriateness (I’m not sure if that is a word, and I don’t care, remember?)  Tact.  And I can appreciate tact.  I am fond of professionalism, too.  Common courtesy, being gracious, proper, P.C., if you will.

However, there is enjoyment to be had in slipping out of the suit and heels to keep it real.  Direct. Straight-up and to the point communication and articulation.  Say what you really want to say how you want to.  Dishing it as it comes.

Ahh…

I believe that we all can appreciate being able to do so, and when it comes from a place of truth, then I think that we all can benefit from being on the receiving end.

That said, this is for me.  No one else.  A single soul might not ever happen across this alphabet soup of mine.  But if they do, they are sure to find me, a few of my contradictions, quite a few of my opinions, a shred of arrogance, a little bit of insecurity and a lot of blind confidence, but mostly my rantings expressed with great liberty, in this, my own Diary of a Mad Writer.

The reader bored enough with life to read more than a couple lines of my verse and blessed enough to be led by the Heavens to do so, is sure to pair pieces of my personal status, ascribed and achieved, and ‘place my face’ so-to-speak.  However, these will not be packaged for you by me so that you can tuck me away neatly in the boxes of your mental.  Nope.  I’d rather be cast into the junk drawers of your psyche’.

I think the best part about a description in a good book is that each reader’s imagination gets to put together the pieces of what the author reveals to construct a picture in their own mind.  And it is likely that each picture imagined is different.

I don’t care for games, and I’m not fashioning with mystery, popular ambiguity, or blurred lines…just choosing not to limit you or me.

#imwrite

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